photo-1417024321782-1375735f8987We hear the word haters thrown around a lot these days. It’s a strong word that can refer to anyone from a mild antagonist to a sworn enemy. We all know people that have made life unpleasant. We’ve all had naysayers. Especially in early recovery. Whatever you decide to call such people, I’d like to suggest that we learn to value their place in our lives. Here’s why.

They may not know it, but sometimes the naysayers can be a more profound power for our success in recovery than the “yaysayers” in our lives. Sure, we all prefer to be around people who encourage us and we should spend most — if not all — our time with positive people. But while it’s great to hear, “You can do it!,” sometimes it’s more powerful to hear people tell you that you can’t.

If I’m honest, I’d have to admit that some of my best achievements have been more attributable to naysayers than yaysayers. Maybe they didn’t intend for it to be this way, but the naysayers have had an immeasurably positive effect on my life. Maybe they weren’t sincerely seeking to help me, but nonetheless their contributions have been incalculable. They’ve raised me to a level I never thought I could achieve — had it not been for their wonderfully negative influence in my life.

So a big thank you is in order. In some part, I owe my recovery to you.

This isn’t some twisted way to say nanny nanny nanny. Oh alright, maybe I am getting a teeny bit of pleasure writing this. But this is more than some petty, veiled attempt to school the naysayers of the world. In fact, I hope not a single one of them is reading this right now. I don’t want to mess up our little arrangement. We should want them to keep doing what they’re doing so that we can keep doing what we’re doing: Getting ahead in our recovery and always taking life to next levels.

I’m writing this to encourage people in recovery –especially early recovery — and to communicate a primal human truth. People tend to rise to the occasion when they’re told that they can’t accomplish certain things. There’s something about it. It beefs up our resolve. It motivates us in those deep, psychological mind-spaces.

Maybe this whole idea is a little sick. But like it or not, it’s true.

One last thing. Whatever you do, don’t let your naysayers in on this. It’s our little secret. I know it’s not easy to hear people spew negativity your way. I know we want to retaliate. But the best thing we can do is rise above it. Transcend. Just quietly go on to achieve amazing things in your recovery. People may be able to argue with your well-worded logic but they can’t argue with your new life. You can’t argue with integrity and a life well-lived.

Stay the course!

Source: Impact Recovery